There are moments where I feel worried. I either worry about what people think of me, about work, my passions, and the thoughts I have.
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Quite regularly I find myself in a happy state of being, but at that very same time, I worry if this is ever gonna last. I worry if the negative, down talking, maybe even depressing, and haunting thoughts and feelings will return. And the moment I worry about this, they have returned.
I worry if the negative, down talking, maybe even depressing, and haunting thoughts and feelings will return.
It feels like I am scared of a ghost just outside my door. I don’t want the ghost to enter my room, yet I am worried that it is waiting for me. So I go to the door, open it, to see if it’s there, and then, what I feared most has happened. The ghost has entered my room and now haunts it.
This is often what worry does to us. It thinks about a potential problem, setback, or fear. By thinking and worrying about it those problems come in. They start to haunt you.
The things you worry about, always have something to do with what you rather not want to happen, but often by worrying they become reality. This way you prove yourself right. You prove to yourself that your worries were a good thing, because in the end that which you worried about became reality.
This is an endless cycle, of worrying, and worries becoming reality, only reinforcing the belief that worrying is a good thing or a necessary thing to do. It has reinforced my belief that worrying is a great thing to do, but I am done worrying.
Literally done worrying about every nook and cranny of my life. I feel that it is time for me to be free of worrying, well not free of worrying. But to understand it, and with that free myself of it. So I feel more alive.
Get Rid of Worries
The first thing I tried, to deal with my worries, was to get rid of them. To cut things short, it didn’t work. Here’s why.
Getting rid of your worries doesn’t work, just like you cannot, not think about a pink elephant after reading this. If we don’t want to think about something, we only reinforce the thinking about that thing.
By trying to rid my life of worries, through various techniques. Like affirmations, or journaling. But that didn’t work, because then I started to worry about if the affirmations and journal sessions would be enough to get rid of worrying.
When we want to get rid of it, that becomes a reason to worry.
You see how persistent worrying is. When we want to get rid of it, that becomes a reason to worry. Thus the loop of worrying continues.
It’s not something that is sustainable, because you’ll see that worrying will come back if you push it away. Either conscious or unconscious.
It was insanity to think that I could control my worries and my thoughts. The moment I believed that I could control them I was only manipulating, and condemning a part of myself that is perfectly capable of living by itself, and hold vast amounts of beauty.
Stop Controlling Your Mind
I see that many of you might want to control their minds or their emotions. In this case their worries. You in some way want to have control over it because if you have control over it, it means you can decide when it leaves. This means you can stop worrying at any time you’d like to.
Nothing is more false than this. Because, yes we might be able to control our mind, but by doing that we take its counterpart away from our life experience as well.
This means that if we take away our worries in life, we also take away our appreciation for life. These two go together. Most of the time after worries, we see that it is silly to worry, and because we realize this we can appreciate what is already here.
This means that if we take away our worries in life, we also take away our appreciation for life.
Now, this is how we deal with our worries. This is what helped me worry significantly less. I stopped trying to rid myself of worries. I stopped with the affirmations, the journalling, all the silly things we acquire that we believe help us live happier lives. But it doesn’t because now our happiness in life is attached to a practice, which we can’t always keep up with.
So what do I propose instead? I am talking about proposing because you must decide for yourself if this is the right thing for you. It might be, so I hope you give it a try.
What helped me deal with my worries has been to cease the judgment over them.
What helped me deal with my worries has been to cease the judgment over them. You see, we are so quick to judge, even on our own minds. Like worrying, we have labeled this as a bad thing to do, as something to get rid of. But why would there be a part of us that is useless, that is bad? And isn’t our desire to get rid of it even worse?
A few weeks back I stopped fighting my worries. I stopped the internal dialogue that was constantly saying that worrying was a bad thing to do. I stop to see worrying as something bad. But instead, I listened to it and used it as a creative practice.
Listen to Your Worries
Wait, what? Your worries became a creative practice? You might ask.
Yes, they did. All this trying to get rid of our worries completely denies that they have extraordinary value as well. If we can be silent. You see all our worrying about a particular matter can help us uncover the real problem, it can help us improve, transform, or better ourselves (or maybe even a part of the world).
Many of the greatest minds in this world have embraced their worries. They didn’t push them away. They listened to them because these worries could easily identify things that could be improved as well as the way to improve them.
Many of the greatest minds in this world have embraced their worries. They didn’t push them away.
People like Steve Jobs and his team weren’t afraid to worry, they worried about how the new interface of the Mac wouldn’t be human friendly, but because of this worrying, they were able to identify and resolve many of the not-so-user-friendly parts of the interface.
They used their worries as creative power, instead of something to force out of their life, knowing that this would result in both a struggle and less enjoyment of life.
All this fighting we do with our worries, it’s time we stop that. Instead, let’s listen to it. Not in a way that we go after it, and follow what it says.
All this fighting we do with our worries, it’s time we stop that. Instead, let’s listen to it.
You see if you worry that you will never be able to have your dream job, don’t follow it by giving up. Do the opposite. Listen to it, and understand why it worries. Why are you worrying about landing your dream job? It could be that you are afraid of the opinions of others, or the years it might take to finally land it.
All these are worries, and they are perfectly fine. No need to rid your life of these worries. They help you understand things better, that is, if you dare to observe your worries. Which means to sit with them, listen to them, observe them, without a need to resolve them or get rid of them.
You’ll see that if you listen to your worries, and observe what’s happening within you, you will understand what’s happening. You will understand yourself better, and through that understanding, a resolution will naturally come forth.
You’ll see that if you listen to your worries, and observe what’s happening within you, you will understand what’s happening.
Creative Use of Worries
We should use our worries creatively. See its potentials, see what it wants to tell us. We should listen, and get in touch with it. It’s a creative force, and just as much part of this life experience as any other feeling.
This approach of listening, and observing your worries, is much larger than just worries. This approach applies to many things I found, and it is the way you get in touch with yourself. You will through this, understand yourself, and tap into your natural inner guidance and wisdom.
This in return will make you feel vastly more alive. It will have you enjoy your life, whether that be experiences of joy or happiness, or worry and anxiety. Because by observing, and listening to ourselves we become a loving force, and that loving observation will have you say, Today I Lived! I made the most of it.
Listen to your worries wisely, and see how they can help you in life. This is one of the extra lessons I want to share about tapping into our creative power to help you feel more alive. There are 36 more lessons on living a creative life that I hand-picked and crafted into a 100+ page ebook. Which is The Fire Within, a way to get in touch with your unique creative strength, and use it to feel more alive.
This ebook will be for free for a limited amount of downloads. The first 10 000 people who click this link will be able to download it for free. After that, it will be available to buy on my own website.
Download it right here: The Fire Within – Today I Lived
I guarantee you that these 36 lessons are incredible and they have helped me say Today I Lived! Just as much as this lesson did.
For now, remember to make the most of life.