I just spend about 45 minutes scrolling mindlessly on TikTok. I forget about my tea, sadly it’s cold now and… Well. I feel that I just wasted 45 minutes of my life. Because I haven’t achieved anything. As a response to this feeling of emptiness inside. I started to, internally, shout at myself. “Why are you wasting all this time on social media? You could have…”
What could I have done other than scroll on social media? That’s what I wondered. And there is an insane amount of things I could have done instead. Like watering the plants, clean my closet, clean my room, write this article, grow my audience, research topics, meditate, work on the book, edit videos, and that list can go on till the end of days.
There is always something better to do with the time you spend on social media. I know that, and you probably do too. It’s just that I don’t think we should blame ourselves too much. And no this is not gonna be a story on blaming social media for being addictive. No one is gonna be blamed, but instead, everything is gonna be as it is.
The Better Thing To Do
We are so quick to blame ourselves for spending too much time on social media. For not being productive or achieving anything. Simply because productivity, achievement, work, doing valuable things, have been at the top of our priority list. Social media isn’t on there for many. Cause it’s a ‘waste’ of time.
And so we start blaming ourselves each time we spend too much time on social media. Of course, there are so many better things to do than mindlessly scroll through social media, yet that’s not helping us, is it?
You see, we are quick on blaming ourselves when we are doing something wrong. You are probably blaming yourself for scrolling social media on the toilet and staying there for about 30 minutes, wasting away precious time. Be honest with yourself, you’ve done that. But…
You’re not helping yourself by blaming yourself.
You’re not helping yourself by blaming yourself. It’s actually wasting a lot more time as a result. Just think back for me, too when you were a child. Your parents have probably blamed you for something. It’s quite a common response.
When you messed something up. For example, you dropped and broke a glass or something like that. You were blamed. They got annoyed or mad at you. Now did that help you understand what you did wrong?
Not at all. It did make you realize that you shouldn’t drop and break a cup, yet they didn’t make you understand what you did wrong. The moment you broke the glass you knew that you had done something wrong. Only you didn’t blame yourself for it. Your response would probably be something like this “oops” and then you’d continue with your life.
It was an accident. Something that just happened, and you didn’t do it on purpose. So why are your parents mad?
Now that’s exactly what we are doing to ourselves when in this case, instead of breaking a glass, we are scrolling on social media. Internally we blame ourselves for this. Yet for what really? For wasting time? For doing something unimportant? Surely by blaming yourself for doing this you are yet again wasting more time, and blaming yourself isn’t important either right?
Surely by blaming yourself for doing this you are yet again wasting more time, and blaming yourself isn’t important either right?
So just like your younger self being blamed for breaking a glass, you don’t understand what you did wrong. You know you could have done something different, but oh well, it’s already something of the past isn’t it?
And it is. Therefore I say the biggest waste of your time isn’t scrolling on social media. It’s your response afterward that’s only making things worse.
If we were to catch ourselves scrolling on social media mindlessly we should just go with that realization and start doing something we do want to be doing. All this blaming, fretting, internal fighting, is only a waste of our time.
We all make mistakes, just like little kids do. We haven’t changed a single bit, only the mistakes we make have changed, and our responses to those mistakes.
Your response to your mistakes has taken the shape of your parents or caretakers. That got mad at you or blamed you for making a mistake. Their anger never helped you improve anything. It only made you scared, and the next time you made a mistake you were scared of it.
If we would drop that blaming, and anger approach to our mistakes, we have an opportunity at hand. An opportunity to in this very moment, make a change. That’s all we need to do really.
If we would drop that blaming, and anger approach to our mistakes, we have an opportunity at hand.
So, when you catch yourself scrolling social media mindlessly, you could do one of two things.
- Blame yourself for scrolling social media, and focussing on the wasted minutes that you could have been spent on something more important. (which means you are wasting even more time) Or;
- You could just recognize that you scrolled social media which you didn’t feel was important, and then just put away your phone, and move on.
Just as a kid reacts to its mistakes. It’s already done. The moment you realize that you have been scrolling on social media and wasting your time, you have learned the lesson. You don’t need to blame yourself anymore.
You could just say “oops I scrolled social media again” and continue your day, just like a kid.
What is done, is done. Move on. Realize you are already aware of the lesson and start doing the things that are valuable.
Two Steps To Improve
All this thinking, blaming, self-hatred, isn’t improving our lives. We should try to minimize it. Now with that, I don’t mean push it away. Just like I explained above we should realize we are doing it, then take that lesson and move on.
Those two steps are really all it takes to improve yourself.
- Step one: Recognise the lesson, which happens the moment you realize what you could have done differently
- Step two: take the lesson and implement it right away, just move on
Don’t fret about the past, or make a fuzz about it. It’s done. Move on. You are living in this moment. Not in the past. In no way am I saying that mindlessly scrolling social media is a particularly good thing to do. What I am saying is that you have probably already realized that this isn’t a great thing to do.
That realization is really all you need to make a change. Right at the same time you realize something you could do differently, you have the chance to make a change. Because we are alive right now. At this moment. Which means all the lessons are right here around us. We don’t need to read books, or articles, or anything for that.
Just those two things, recognize the mistake, therefore the lesson, take the lesson and move on. In that process, we remember that we are alive right now. Any time spend fuzzing about what we did wrong in the past is yet again wasting more of this precious lifetime.
So the most important thing remains, remember that Today You Live! Make the most of it.